
Personal Changes
An initial enhanced self-concept is a predictable consequence of getting married. Your parents and closest friends will arrange their schedules of participate in your wedding and will give you gift to express their approval.
The married person also begins adopting new values and behaviors consistent with the married role. Although new spouses often vow that "marriage won't change me," it does. For example, rather than stay out all night at a party, which is not uncommon for singles who may be looking for someone to bed, spouses (who are already paired off) tend to go home early. Their roles of spouse, employee, and parent, force them to adopt more regular hours. The role of married person implies a different set of behavior than the role of single person. Although there is an initial resistance to "becoming like old married folks," the resistance soon gives way to the realities of the role.
Another result of getting married is disenchantment. It may not happen in the first few weeks or months of marriage, but it is almost inevitable. Farrah Fawcett once said, "Marriage - that's when the blazing torch of love slowly turns into a pilot light." Whereas courtship is the anticipation of a life together, marriage is the day-to-day reality of that life together - and reality does not always fit the dream. Daily marital interaction expose both partners as they really are: human beings who get tired and irritable. "Burt never snapped at me about anything when we are dating, but I never acted like a mean bitch (his term) before in courtship.
The speed of the disenchantment process may be related to the number of other changes going on in the partner' lives.
Read More On Related Post
RSS Feed